Oooooooof!

I tell you, I'm about ready for a drink! Poor mom. Thursday night, she came upstairs about the same time and wanted to go sit on the front porch and wait for the "man" who was coming to pick her up. I tried to tell her that she must have dreamt it, but she would not listen to me. So we went and sat and waited. I kept on asking her who it was that was coming to pick her up and she has such a hard time talking, I couldn't make hide nor tail of what she was trying to say. I brought up dad, nope. One of her sons? Nope. Then I asked if it was someone she used to work with. That was it! I asked "A long time ago?" No, recently, she tried to get out. Hmmmmm. She's imagining it, alright. It is so difficult watching your parent deteriorate before your very eyes.

Finally, as the sun began to set, the porch lights came on. That was a sign that it was getting dark to her. She said "Well, I guess he's not coming" in her brokenspeech. So we went downstairs and I got her PJs on her and tucked her in. I kept on telling her that she must have had a dream, that I have dreams all the time and don't know if they are real or not (I don't but I thought she could connect.) She went to sleep at 8 p.m. I woke up several times during the night to make sure she was still asleep and she was awake by 3 a.m.

I'm thinking maybe her internal clock is so messed up from the time change. Maybe if I get her to sleep through the night, she will have a better sleeping pattern. So, last night, I called in one of her old prescriptions that make her sleepy. I gave it to her at 6 and by 8, I again tucked her into bed. I awoke at 4 and she was still asleep! Yea. We are going to try and get her into see her doctor on Monday. (Don't know why I said "WE!") I called her doctor on Friday, of course it was his day off. So, Monday, I will ask him about something that can perhaps regulate her sleeping patterns. Maybe even melatonin. I'm afraid to try it until I can talk with him. With the other medicine, I knew it wasok because she was on it for several years. Anyhoo, we'll see what he says on Monday.

To say the least, I haven't been sleeping. Every sound I hear, I jump out of bed and make sure it's not her roaming. Of course, the kid and I are leaving next Sunday for Paris, the teenager heads to Amsterdam with a group of his friends (joy). I'm staying a week, the kid for several with our friends there. The hub will be home while I'm gone and I'm working on having our friend Sherry come in the afternoon until the hub gets home. I'm not quite sure how mom feels about the hub these days after last summer's onset of confusion. She's still a little offish towards him at times as if she doesn't remember who he is. It just breaks my heart. They were so close. The hub is such a sweetheart and understands completely. I don't know that I could be as understanding if it weren't my mom. Anyway, I am so up in the air about everything. I hope I can get her "regulated" before leaving. Once again, I will sit and worry the entire time unless I am on the phone with someonereassuring me that everything is ok.

I went out last night and purchased two books on dementia and taking care of aging parents. I delved into one last night and it's all just so sad. I know it will continue to get worse and I need to start looking into some kind of help so she will still be alert enough to get to know them, like our friend Sherrie. Sherrie has a family of her own and can't be here all the time. She has offered to help all summer as needed which is a Godsend. But I will need to find an extra person. Anyhoo, just a lot on my mind right now.

The hub comes home tomorrow with lots of chocolate from Zurich. Yes, I gave him a shopping list! I'm going to have a giveaway on Monday. In fact,I'll just go ahead and make a post about it now while I have it on my mind. I'm just a little scattered right now, ya think? Ooooooof!